wedding planning advice

Attention to anyone planning a wedding! Congratulations to you for being able to celebrate your love for your fiance, your children, or your friend. This is an exciting and joyful time, but can sometimes be stressful especially if you have never planned an event this big. Things that you never thought would be discussed are now giving you sleepless nights! I feel your pain, and have been there myself.
First take a deep breath! It's all going to be okay. After seeing lots of ideas and tons of weddings, I'm going to give you my top 10 idea's or suggestions from my experiences to ensure a smooth and fun filled event.
1. Hire a coordinator.
2. Have the event at one venue.
3. Have the ceremony and reception back to back.
4. Have a back up plan for the kids.
5. No open Mic.
6. Have the music start before the dinner is finished.
7. Put the dance floor and bar as close together as possible.
8. Give your people water at the end of the night.
9. Provide transportation
10. Be creative, Be yourself!

1. Hire a coordinator! I know what you're thinking. That's expensive and ridiculous, my parents got it under control, my Aunt Betty is paying all the vendors the day of the wedding, or I have everything under my belt and am doing it all!
Good one! For less stress for everyone involved, it really does make a difference to have someone not related to the situation in contact with everything and everyone the day of the wedding and not you or your parents. This is your day to shine (or your children's), let someone else do the dirty work.
Coordinators can do a number of different jobs which you designate for them or they can do everything, depending on your budget. They can also coordinate all the other "coordinators" ... be it your mother or mother-in-law, the church lady, and the head dog at the reception site. They can also be great defenders of what you want. For example, your d.j. starts playing songs from your "DO NOT PLAY LIST!" The coordinator confronts the situation, not you! How brilliant is that. They are the bad guy for you!!! Awesome.
If you need suggestions or someone to talk to for ideas, call Lynette at Embrace Event Planning 715.824.6828 www.embraceeventplanning.com She has a number of different packages for any budget.
Your wedding is a celebration. Let your parents, best friend, and yourself enjoy your day as much as possible. It goes by so fast, don't waste any time the day of the wedding dealing with rubbish that someone else could be handling while you are getting your hair done or dancing your first dance!

2. Have your wedding at one venue! What a great way to get everyone in attendance to actually show up at the ceremony. This is sometimes hard to hear, but the truth. Many times with separate venues for ceremony and reception many will only go to the reception where the food, drinks, and fun is at.
I know it's hard to believe that Uncle Bob doesn't want to see you walk down the aisle, but if you don't give them a reason to believe that your ceremony is going to be different than the last 30 they have seen, or have it connected to the time when they think they "really need to be there" they will skip out and wait for the good stuff!
This may not be as easy for traditional brides being that most churches aren't able to host a rockin' reception. My suggestion for that is in number 3!

3. Have ceremony and reception back to back! Now sometimes this isn't possible to due church restrictions for designated times that they "think" a wedding needs to take place. If your church only allows weddings at noon on Saturday because they have a 4pm service the same day, here is one suggestion. Try asking them nicely if they can step out of the box a little and have a candle light service after their 4pm Saturday service. Have your ceremony at 6pm and cocktails starting at 7pm at the reception. This takes a huge load off your guest having to dedicate 10 hours to ties and high heels. If you want your day to be a lot longer, plan a getting ready time with the girls with brunch and mimosa's, or an early round of golf for the guys. You can have events planned all day, if need be, that don't have to involve all 300 guests.

4. Have a back up plan for the Kids!!! Many brides have a mini-bridesmaid or flower girl who is just the cutest thing in the whole world be a part of the wedding. She is sweet, well mannered, and the best child you have ever encountered! No one, especially her parents, expected the freak out that happened as she started heading down the aisle at the church!
For the children in the wedding and their parents (your siblings or your best friend) have a back up plan for them if they loose it. Hire a professional babysitting service or the teenager from down the street for the evening to be on call just in case the little ones need a big time out. This allows for the kids to be taken care of (or asleep) but doesn't require the parents to have to ditch out on your big day. What a nice surprise when you can tell your brother he doesn't have to leave with the kids but "Kelly the sitter and CPR certified professional" will take the kids until you are done at the party! BRILLIANT!

5. Open mic night is Wednesdays at the coffe house, not at your wedding! WARNING! I have not once seen an open mic at the reception turn out well! (especially if you are serving alcohol with dinner.)
It sounds like a great idea ... "Let anyone who wants to say something nice about us get up and talk!" In the movies it always turns out lovely and endearing. Let's just say this gives the last person you would expect the idea that it is okay to get on their soap box and discuss anything they want. I have heard it all! From Maxie pads and puberty, to political views about 9/11! My point, if you want someone to toast your new marriage, let them know ahead of time so they can prepare and have your coordinator on hand to tell Uncle Bob that now isn't the right time to get on the microphone!!!

6. Have the music start before dinner is finished. If you are having a band or d.j., please have them start while the dinner portion of the night is finishing up. I have seen this many times. The dinner ends at 7:30 but the band isn't supposed to start until 8pm. Some people mill around a bit and other see this as the perfect time to take off.
Unfortunately people leave if their isn't something keeping them involved. Keep the action happening and people will stay all night!

7. Put the bar and dance floor as close together as possible! Now this may just be a midwest thing, but if you put the bar in a different room and the expensive band you hired in another, everyone will be standing by the bar and no one will pay attention to the band. If you put the action and the alcohol in the same place the two feed off each other and magic happens. It makes me feel ill when I see the expensive band playing away and everyone is in the other room with the bar. It's shocking I know, but it's true especially here in the midwest!

8. At the end of the night ... have water available! With about an hour left have your coordinator bring out the bottled water that you bought at Sam's Club this winter that was on sale. Have it at the bar and also at the exits. Not only is it a nice to have for the walk or ride home, but may actually stop someone from ordering another expensive drink.

9. Provide transportation! What a better way to say thank you for helping us celebrate then getting everyone back to the hotel safe. Let's face it, we want everyone to have a great time, we offer them free drinks all night, and then send them off on their own and hope they get there without a D.U.I. or find themselves in a ditch.
DUH, not smart!!! For the extra money and peace of mind, give the gift of a safe ride home.

10. If you have an idea for something different, DO IT! Whether it's a different song or reading during the ceremony or having the reception on the top of the tallest building in your town ... do it. Make this your wedding, not the one you went to last month. Spice up your party. Trust your gut. If you always wanted Mexican food at your wedding, get it. If you hate wearing white, wear a red dress. If you want Hawaii but can't afford to get everyone there, bring a Luau party to your reception. Make it special, make it yours, and trust yourself.

If you need any advice about an idea or are not sure about something you think could be great, please don't hesitate to ask. All the best to you and cheers to your future planning!!! Em